When Mama Isn't Ready For The Naps To Stop...Are We Ever?

It's ironic how kids never want to nap, and most of the parents I know would pay big money to be able to take a nap in the middle of the day.  Everyday!

Here is the method I used for getting my older toddler to continue taking daily naps because mama wasn't ready to give them up yet. My method is for children who will sleep "on the move" either in a car or in a stroller.

SIDE NOTE: My Big Girl is what my husband and I consider to be a Spirited Child and this is what worked for us to get her to wind-down. I say this not to label my child or make excuses for her or for me, but to offer hope in case you have a Spirited Child as well and are wondering if they will ever sleep in your lifetime. Gotta find what soothes them and run with it!

I was able to keep my older child napping daily for at least an hour+ til the middle/end of 3 years old.  She is going to be 5 years old very soon (GASP!!) and she will still fall asleep on occasion if we find ourselves in the car during "nap time," especially if she is going through a growth spurt like lately. Like most toddlers, she was extremely high energy and didn't sit still for too long and enjoyed bouncing from one thing to another. I had a new baby at the time too so mama was desperate to keep baby #1 aka Big Girl napping for as long as humanly possible. However, she wasn't goin' down without a fight. Here is my method for doing all I could to prolong the napping process.

The Sleepy Drive.
At nap time pretty much everyday during the week when I was partakin' in some solo parenting, I packed Big Girl and Baby Brother into the car for our daily "sleepy drive" and we all enjoyed the daily wind-down. I put on some very soothing music, gave them each their lovie and a blanket (if it was chilly) and we drove around til they fell asleep. It usually took no more than 15 minutes, but honestly, there were many, many days where I wouldn't even get down the block and at least one of them were already asleep. We have some great "sleepy drive music." It's like Pavlov's Dog.

You did a sleepy drive every single day?
Yep. I was OK with doing this every day at that time because, like everything else with children (good and bad), I knew it wouldn't last forever...and it worked!  Having an overtired toddler who is fussing and crying and fighting a nap for 45+ minutes every single day and then only sleeps for 30 minutes doesn't work when you have a nursing baby who also needs to wind-down and nurse and catch his 15th cat nap of the day - always at the same time of course.

The Early Years:
There was a time where both of them would wake up if I dared move their slumbering body out of the car seat to their bed so during that point in time I prepped everything to kick it in the car for the duration of the nap. I got some things for me to read or write and eat/drink (or I'd get drive-thru coffee!!) and then find a nice, quiet, shady spot by the park (away from any and all leaf blowers!) and we'd chill-out for a good hour to 2 hours or however long they needed to nap that day. Being a SAHM I was able to have this luxury of time during the day, and I'm so thankful for it.

"Is It Time For A Sleepy Drive Yet, Mommy?"
This was a very welcomed break for all three of us during our hectic, ever changing day. The kids were comfortable in their seats, and I was able to chill-out and have a bit of much needed "mama time" where I didn't feel like I had to fold laundry or do dishes (because how could I?? We weren't home. heehee.) I'd spend that time either staring blankly out the window thinking about nothing in particular except for how to get more sleep, I'd make a bunch of To-Do lists and shopping lists, I'd do my bills, I'd run through the drive up ATM (A mother must have designed those), I'd write blogs or I'd read parenting books/magazines. One time I dosed off still wearing my sunglasses,  holding my coffee cup in one hand and a parenting book in the other hand. The parenting book was no doubt a "How-To-Get-More-Sleep" book. Baby Brother was just a few weeks old...life was a wee fuzzy back then. These daily car "kick it" naps became a really nice way to break up the day and a good excuse for mama to relax and meditate.

A 2-in-1 Nap:
Sometimes, depending on what we had going on that afternoon, I'd wake them up or they would wake on their own and we'd get out and play at the park for a bit since we were already there. I made sure to bring along a blanket and some snacks to munch on picnic style, as well as have sand digging toys at the ready. It helped that Baby Brother was still breastfeeding only at that time, so I only had to bring snacks for one kiddo. So I'd sit on the park bench and nurse Baby Brother and chat with other moms while Big Girl got to play with a bunch of new kids since she was always stuck with boring 'ol mama and baby.

That's great an all, but my kids won't sleep in the car.
When Big Girl was toying with the idea of wanting to give up naps around 2-ish when I was pregnant and exhausted with Baby Brother, ("Uhhh, No!") I would pack her in her stroller at nap time and we'd go for a long walk to the park and she'd usually fall asleep. She protested being in any sort of carrier at a very early age. She wanted to be down to boogie around. Thank goodness she was baby #1 because baby #2 lived in a wrap attached to my body. That is the only way I ever got anything done during daylight hours. As a toddler, if she didn't fall asleep in the stroller on our "sleepy walk," then I figured we still got out of the house and had a nice walk together in the sunshine. My pregnant cankles thanked me. If she did nap (bonus for mama!), I'd stop and sit in the shade and read and have a snack and watch butterflies and hummingbirds. Sometimes I'd walk up to the store to walk the isles in peace or grab some lunch or coffee while she napped in the stroller covered with a light blanket for shade and quiet. One of my favorite things to do back then when she fell asleep on our walk was go to the grocery store and get a coffee and maybe something to munch on and sit at their little cafe and read all of the trashy celebrity magazines (for free of course) and get my fill on mindless brain chatter like who was dating whom and who was pregnant, who broke up, who got married...you know, all of the really important things in life.  That's all my preggo mom brain could muster back then.

The Win-Win Scenairo - Getting 2 To Nap:
After Baby Brother was born I'd squeeze him in the Moby Wrap and pack Big Girl in the stroller and we'd all walk. Baby Brother viewed his car seat like a torture chamber and screamed his tiny head off for the duration of our trip regardless of how long it was. So you can imagine my shock and horror super panic when I realized very early on that our tried and true method of the nap time sleepy drives for Big Girl #1 was no longer going to work since Baby Brother was being attacked by aliens back there. Regroup and adapt. He'd sleep in the wrap (and I could nurse him while walking and pushing a stroller if I had to in order to get him back to sleep while we were out - that was my mama superpower), and I already knew that she'd sleep in the stroller. Check.

It sounds silly, but you kinda feel like a rockstar when you get both kids napping at once.  You wish the paparazzi would follow you around and snap up some pics.
Headlines: "Rockstar Super Mom of Teething Baby and Wild Child Toddler gets them BOTH napping at the SAME TIME! What is her secret?!"OK sure, I'll sign autographs. 

Find what works for your children and run with it. If it works for them, then by golly it will work for you! Especially when it comes to sleep-precious-sleep!
I am always changing and adapting to their specific needs be it a walk, a snuggle in the carrier, a rock in the rocker or a car ride because frankly, I needed to have some peace and quiet during the day where they BOTH were asleep (a rare thing with more than 1 child) so I could recharge my mama batteries - so I just tried different things all the time until I found what worked for everyone to get them to sleep each day, peacefully. Some days it was really hit or miss. On the days where it was a "miss," I cried.

Loose-Loose.
Sometimes a "new thing" would only last a week or so and there were PLENTY of times where only one would fall asleep and the other one was W-I-D-E awake, so it's never going to be a home run. That was tough if we were parked somewhere and the awake child was fussy because they wanted to get out and it would eventually wake the other one up...which made mama fussy.  So then we'd just play and play and run wild at the park and *hope* that everyone went down early for bed that night.

Yeaaaaaaa riiiiiiiiiiiight!

The More Things Change The More They Stayed The Same.
As everyone got older and daily naps were still in order - at least for my lil guy, we'd continue with our sleepy drives and Baby Brother would fall asleep and Big Girl would wind-down. She loves to go for drives and enjoys all types of music, likes cuddling with her favorite stuffed guys and finds it a very calming experience overall. Thank goodness. After about 3 months of solid screaming whenever we got near the car let alone got in the car and got buckled, Baby Brother finally made peace with his car seat. Fast forward to 2 years later, he now finds it a calming experience as well, so we can now do sleepy drives for him if we need to. That was a long road. However, he doesn't fight naps everyday like it's his job like his big sister did when she was his age. There are days where I can see that he's getting tired and I'll scoop him up and we'll go into his dark room and snuggle with a blankie for a few minutes in his rocking chair (there are usually a few tears and a minimal bit of fussing and protesting - he is 2 after all) and he'll fall right asleep for a good 2-3 hours.

I know. I'd hate me too if I read this when Big Girl was the same age - being a Spirited Child and all. I also would never have believed it because the only time she ever did anything like that was when she was sick.

Stick With What Works.
If Baby Bother is extra wild that day and can't be calmed for a nap using our rocking chair techniques I pull the plug on it quickly so I don't miss "my window" and we'll all head to the car. They know the drill. "Get your lovies, grab your water, put on your sunglasses and let's move out!"  Mama needs a holy-crap-I-can't-keep-my-eyes-open-any-longer-cuz-it's-the-middle-of-the-day frappuccino! Good thing with them being a bit older now too is that we can head right home after they fall asleep and they will actually stay asleep as I get them out of their car seat and put them into their beds. My Big Girl will usually wake up now if she has fallen asleep, but that's ok. She doesn't really need a nap anymore like she did between 0-3 1/2 years and she'll actually sit and have some "quiet time" when Baby Brother is napping - something she would never ever EVER do before. Hence mama's need for her to nap til she was 3+ years old!! Now that she is getting older she actually will go to bed a bit earlier if she's been running around playing like a wild child during the day as opposed to it revving her up like it did when she was a toddler.

You're probably wondering if we need to do sleepy drives for bedtime. 
We've gotten into a pretty locked in night time routine which consists of a warm bubble bath, naked babies running around refusing to put on jammies, lots and lots of books and lots and lots of cuddling. We're at the point now with our Big Girl where we say, "this is the last book" and we close it, give hugs and kisses and daddy will sing a song he's made up freestyle based on whatever she wants him to sing about ("Horsey Horsey" is a long standing favorite) and we say "night night" and close her door. It has become a rare occasion that she comes out after we say goodnight since she is usually asleep within minutes later.

It was a looooooong road. #SpiritedChild.

Baby Brother still gets rocked to sleep in mama's arms every night like baby #1 at that age because he's my sweet lil cuddle bug and I throughly enjoy our quiet time together at bedtime. And again, he's only 2.  Then daddy comes in to put him into his big boy toddler bed.  He's pretty heavy. Sometimes he wants to sleep with us if he's been fussy so we put him in our bed, and sometimes when I turn his light out after we read books (and before we cuddle and rock in the rocking chair) he hops outta my arms and crawls into his bed on his own bed and says, "I go night night."  
Me: "But...but, don't you want mama to rock you and snuggle you and sing to you til you fall asleep?"  Sniff*Sniff*
Baby Brother: "I sleepy. Bay go night night."
Me: "Night Night My Sweet Love" (Kisses Big Boy, wipes single tear that has escaped my eye and closes his door.)

Night Time Sleepy Drives.
We certainly are no stranger to night time sleepy drives that is for sure. If we've had a particularly hectic day and it's hard to calm the savage beasts or if company has just left after a fun evening and our kids are wild beyond measure or if it was a special dinner and dessert was served we just cut to the chase and take a sleepy drive. I enjoy the quiet time with my husband listening to our sleepy music and having a very quiet conversation while the kids calm down. It was especially enjoyable during Christmas time and we got to see everyone's lights. And I'll admit, when Big Girl was a baby/toddler, we put more miles on our car at night then we ever did during the day. #SpiritedChild. But that was ok. It didn't last forever and it gave my husband and I some really nice, quiet bonding time with each other each evening while we drove around the neighborhood waiting for our little fighter to finally cave in and close her sweet lil lids.

Ever changing, always adapting. Life as a mom.

If you want to laugh til you pee your pants then read this.

Me: "Why yes, yes this is a pic I took straight from my computer screen," says the lazy girl with no printer ink.
Me: "But why didn't you crop it or take a better...or at least clean your...I don't know, do something different?"
Me: (Looks in mirror. Looks back at pic - shrugs. Looks back at mirror.) *blink*blink*blink
Me: (Supinates palms and shrugs in an aggressive manner.)
Me: "Supinates?" *scratch*scratch*scratch
Me: (Disgust snorts and walks away...)
Me: "Wait, I'm waiting for google to load..."
...and scene.

Act II:

My friend Karina sent me this very funny article about pregnancy called, "Here's Some Of The Stuff You Won't Expect When You're Expecting" by Johanna Gohmann (link below) and I just read it and was laughing so hard I almost woke the teething baby who finally fell asleep after much fussing.

IKR?! Not cool!!  LOL!  So of course I had to share it with you. (Thanks Karina!)

If you've never had a baby and you laugh til you pee your pants I'll be impressed (and then I'll recommend an embarrassing exercise that can be done in line at the grocery store and none will be the wiser.) If you've had a baby or two, or three or 14 - (who knows, Octomom might read my blog you know in her spare time) and you laugh til you pee your pants I'll just say, "Yep.  Sucks don't it?" and hand you a panty liner and your membership pin. Cuz such is life after pushing a big thing out of that small thing.

...as you know. And then I'll still recommend the exercises you keep forgetting to do. Might I remind you that Valentine's Day is tomorrow....hmmmmm?

You're cramming for finals right now, aren't you?

The last time I laughed this much about being pregnant I was on the overly irritated and grotesquely bloated side of 39+ weeks preggo standing up in the isle at the bookstore feverishly reading Belly Laughs by Jenny McCarthy and creating a pregnant lady disturbance with my uncontrollable pregnant lady laughter.

"Excuse me, Ma'am?  Ummm...are you in labor?" 
"Someone complained about loud cackling coming from the pregnancy isle."
"Should I call someone?"
"Is that pee...or...umm...?"

So I bought the book so I could bring it home and sit on my couch in peace, hike my heavy cankles up on the footstool and read it to my husband who had the same uncontrollable laughter as myself.  Awww, isn't that cute?  Two peas in a pod.  It's that whole, "misery loves company" thing. We took our pregnancy weight off together after baby was born too.

Belly Laughs is hilarious and I've recommended it to probably every single pregnant friend of mine I've ever had as well as pregnant strangers - after I rub their belly without asking first and ask them if they are sure they aren't having twins, of course. Except I don't recommend the book to the ultra religious ones...I wait until they are past their due date and then I mail them a copy - anonymously - because even Lord knows you need a good laugh when you are in the, "you-better-friggin'-get-this-gigantic-rib-boxing-baby-outta-me-or-someone-will-get-clawed-in-their-sleep-with-the-toenails-I-haven't-seen-let-alone-cut-in-over-3+months" stage.  AKA: Minimum 1 day past your due date.  The one you calculated for yourself.

Amen. ...Sister.

Well, Johanna Gohmann's article on "xojane" is seriously just as funny as Belly Laughs in my opinion, except that it's only one page - boo. I wish it were a whole book. I'd normally just twitter this link up or faceblast it out, but this is just so cleverly written and super funny I wanted to bronze it on my mom's blog for all internet eternity. So here you go, laugh away. Her first picture alone is worth clicking the link for anyone who's familiar with that look you get when everyone*in*the*universe* keeps*telling*you that you look like you are... (drum roll please) "about to pop."  Yaaaaawn.

"I know, I know, OK??!!  It's my friggin' body. What? You think I'm not totally aware of how big my bell...Actually, you know what? I am about to pop. I'm about to pop you upside the skull for telling me I look like I'm 'about to pop!' Learn some dang What NOT To Say To A Pregnant Lady manners!"

And exhhhhhhhale - - - > 1, 2, 3, 4....  ...there, that felt better. #repressedpregnancyanger


The link:

Here's Some Of The Stuff You Won't Expect When You're Expecting by Johanna Gohmann

You're welcome.  *smiley face*

Oh...and if you can relate to anything I've said here or in Johanna's article, then you are probably going to need this. STAT! 

You're welcome. *shaka*

Top 10 Last-Minute Ways To Get Your Sexy Back By Valentine's Day

 After a long day of changing diapers, putting out tantrum fires,
finger painting, cutting and gluing everything in our path, and scaling Mt. Laundry Pile,
I feel like this Valentine's Day dog.
All droopy and sleepy eyed, needing some coffee and someone to love me
in my unshowered, no make-up,
still-in-my-jammies-because-I'm-way-too-cold-to-get-dressed state.
Thank God for my AMAZING husband who loves me just the way I am!  
Cuz somedays - it just ain't pretty.
Pic by my preschooler - featuring: Bubbles The Dog

Need to get your sexy back right now and don't feel like you have the time?  Here's a list of Top 10 things you can try to get your groove back and celebrate like you did pre-kids!

1. Remove all squeaky and musical toys from your bed.
2. Haven't gotten around to loosing the baby weight or getting your highlights done? Light some candles. Flickering light makes everyone look good. 
3. Move the kids into their own rooms for the night. It's kinda hard to get your sexy back with a co-sleeping preschooler, a toddler sleeping sideways, a baby attached to your breast and your baby daddy on the floor.
4. Forgot to take that pole dancing class at your gym? Watch some Motley Crue videos on YouTube and copy some moves.
5. Don't have dinner reservations? Search “sexy foods” on Google and hope you have some of the ingredients in your fridge.
6. Want to watch a romantic movie to get you in the mood? Pop in The Notebook. Ryan Gosling will do it every time! Just remember to wake up your man, who's sleeping next to you on the couch, when it's time to fool around.
7. Make a sexy playlist on iTunes. Be sure to remove all kid songs. It's hard to get in the mood to the Backyardigans theme song.
8. Search the garage for that naughty nurse's costume you wore for your sororities Halloween party 8 years ago, and while your at it, look for the box that says “pre-pregnancy panties.”
9. Jump in the shower, fix your hair cute, apply make-up, ditch the yoga pants (for once), find a top that isn't covered in baby barf, dig out one of your old bras (not the nursing bras you've been living in), shave off the three months' worth of hair growth from your legs and armpits, trim up any other business you need to attend to, slip into that sexy red dress and heels that haven't seen the light of day since your honeymoon, have a glass of wine at dinner and forget that you are a mom for a few hours. 
10. Take the kids to grandma's,  turn off the lights,  jump into bed with your man and do it all night long without any interruptions. I'm talking about sleep! When you wake up rested for the first time in months you'll have more energy to get frisky.

No more excuses! Which ones do you think you'll try?

*This was originally posted on February 13, 2012 for mom365. Click here to read more of my Top Ten Lists on Mom365. Written by me, Coco Cana. 

Happy Thank You Day! Come Share Your Page!

Here's a Happy Thank You Day paper plate cake.
You don't even have to jog after. Enjoy!

Hey Friends, According to Daniel Tiger's Neighborhood, it's Thank You Day!  (But you knew that.)

 "Thank you day is when we get to say Thank You to all of the people we love!" says Daniel Tiger.

What a sweet lil guy he is. So it's Thank You Day at My Tales From The Crib too!

I know a bunch of talented, creative people who are doing some really great stuff, so if this is you - as a Thank You to you, I'd love for you to please come share your page on our facebook page!

Add links to your blog, twitter, facebook page, website, etc. and tell us a little bit about it. I'll be picking one at random to feature on my mom's blog!  Please "like" our page to share yours.

Now let's share some love.

And Happy Thank You Day!

Your pal,
@Coco_Cana

Can You Do It All? Do Super Parents Exist?

My husband and I are big fans of a funny parenting blog and facebook page called HowToBeADad. I'm sure you've heard of it. Charlie and Andy (The Dads) are very silly, creative, funny and witty and have even been accused of being heartfelt and touching from time to time. Even though they will try to convince you that they are purely an "entertainment blog!" But the love they have for their children and their wives is apparent in their writing and you can just tell that they have the utmost respect for their family. It shows in how they speak so highly of them. Honestly, as a women with a similar-minded hubby, I can fully appreciate and champion that sort of mutual love and respect a husband and wife share for their family and this is what keeps me coming back to their blog regularly. That and they have some super funny reader/commenters too. I've never been so thoroughly entertained by user comments before as I am with the funny folks who enjoy their blog/facebook page. There is just a lot of positive energy going on over there and I like that. Making the hardcore trenches of parenting look fun.

Oh wait....you mean it's...  Nevermind.

So this was posted on their facebook page today and it inspired me to write a blog about it. Besides, this was waaaay too wordy of a comment to leave on anyone's facebook post - even my own! I don't think anyone would really appreciate that kind of gratuitous verbiage as a fb comment. So I thought, "Hey! Wait a sec...I know where I can speak freely and not worry about a word count!  My own gosh darn mom's blog!" (Said in the voice of, Merida from the Disney movie, Brave.)

So here's another post for you to read, mom.  (I'm pretty sure you're the only one left still reading this thing, haha. My faithful, tireless supporter. My mom.)

Charlie from HowToBeADad writes:

"On a daily basis, I'm confronted with trying to be the parent who provides or the parent who is there. How do you deal with it? Cloning? -charlie, http://howtobeadad.com/"

Here are my thoughts, for what's it worth-

Coco Cana from My Tales From The Crib writes:

I think this is probably one of the biggest issues mothers of newborns face after having a baby. Especially if they are on maternity leave from a career they've either worked really hard for, or need to return to due to money issues or both.

Should I stay home or should I go back to work?
Should I work part-time? Full-time? From home?  
Can I even stay home (financially) if I want to?
Can I even afford to go back work (cost of daycare, etc.) if I want to?  
What if I don't want to stay home?  
What if I don't want to go back to work?
Will my career still be there when I return?

I think it's about finding the balance and I think that it can be possible to do both - provide as well as be there. It might not be in the exact form you want it to be or have imagined it to be, but it can possibly be possible - if that makes any sense.

I think it's about being present and in the moment when you are home with your children and making the most of your time together so that when you are away from them working, etc. you can feel confident that you are doing all that you can when you are face-to-face. 

I've been a SAHM (stay-at-home-mom) since the day my oldest was born over *4 1/2 years ago. We have a *2 year old too and during this process of navigating the world of being a full-time SAHM, I've been trying to find pieces of my "old" self again through some freelance writing, keeping up with my mom's blog as well as a couple of new adventures of writing children's books and doing some funny screenplay writing with a super funny writing partner. So in a way I've become a work-from-home-mom, which presents it's own set of challenging aspects. When I'm away from them writing on my own or with my hilariously funny writing partner, Kristin (which is a few hours a week), I'm trying to make the most of my creative time away from them. When I'm home I try to make the most of my face-to-face time with them. As well as find time for my husband and time for me and time for family and time for cleaning and time for grocery shopping and dishes doing and laundry folding and time for friends ...and time for my therapist to deal with all of this constant pulling and tugging at my life on an hourly basis.

*(EDITORS NOTE: Depending on when you are reading this, my kids have aged, bittersweet as it may be. My oldest was born in '06, baby in '10.)

Finding the balance: Easier said than done of course and it doesn't really play out like that everyday. Nobody can accomplish this all the time.  And in this economy, it is becoming harder and harder to live solely off of one income if you want to spend more time at home while the kids are young.  We are on a serious budget just to make it work week-to-week and there are times, oh-so-many-times where I just want to clock out and eat lunch alone listening to "my music" and partaking in some adult convie without all eyes and ears focused on my every everything. And let's face it - it's nice to poop in peace without answering a barrage of questions surrounding your whereabouts.

Can I get an amen?

My struggles with finding the balance: There are always things I can work on to be a better, more present parent; like turning off the computer more when they want to play, or sit on the floor and play trains more as opposed to folding yet another load of endless laundry. But again that is the "balance" I'm talking about. Sometimes certain things need to be done or should be done, but they don't always have to be done right that second. The laundry can wait, or reading an article or commenting on a friend's facebook picture from their vacation can definitely wait. Checking your bank balance can't always wait if you need to make a last minute online panic transfer, or something cooking on the stove can't always wait unless you just planned on ordering a pizza anyway. But a lot of stuff can wait. I know I keep saying it, but we've just got to try to find the balance. It's hard to find it, and somedays are much harder than others, but on the days where it clicks, it's awesome.

And we rarely regret the days we spent playing at the water park all day long as opposed to mowing the lawn, cleaning out the garage, pulling weeds and scrubbing the kitchen floors.

My Partner In Parenting: My husband is the one who works full-time in our house and I'm always amazed at how he can turn on his "daddy brain" the second he takes off his motorcycle helmet and walks into the house - regardless of how taxing his day was at work. He's a very fun, funny, playful guy in general and I think it keeps him young and enjoying life with our young children. His face lights up when he sees them and they can feel that. He's always down on the floor giving horsey rides, or baby wrestling, making up silly songs to squash tantrums, etc. and he tries really hard to make a point to  turn off his phone/computer whenever the kids want to play with him. There are times where they'd rather play by themselves and that is when we feel like we can sneak in a few minutes on the internet or me time or whatever. (Or we sneak it in and go do it in the bathroom........the internet I mean...ahem...cough-cough.)  There are many times of course where we can't be present every second we spend with them which isn't realistic or even what they want from us anyway. Sometimes parents just have to do other stuff when their kids want to play and that is reality, but for the majority of the time we just try to do our best and make our time with them count.

The Days Are Long But The Years Are Short: I have a nephew who is 16 now (Wow! Crazy!) and sadly, he lives very, very far out of state so the precious moments we get to spend with him are unfortunately, few and far between. There was a time not too long ago where I was the "cool Auntie" and he enjoyed spending one-on-one time with just me hanging out. (I taught him how to make a chocolate birthday cake from scratch.)

But now he has a very, very busy life of playing sports full-time and basically he's a typical teenager with a girlfriend and lots of friends who are all busy doing the typical teenager stuff - which pretty much means avoiding any long-term contact at any one siting with anyone over the age of 18.  And that's OK, because we all went through it. But it does strike a hard blow to the gut (and the ego) when you think back to them as a teeny-tiny little baby you took naps with and a fun little toddler you taught colors too and a cool little dude you surfed waves on Kauai with. To you it feels like a few years ago and they can't even remember a lot of it. Especially the baby years. But to them, that was them being a "kid" and now they are not a kid. I repeat, a 16 year old teenager is NOT a kid!

So when I feel like I'm having a hard time being a mom to my own very small children who seem like they will be very small forever, I think back to the quick-as-a-snap childhood of my over 6 feet tall nephew and it just seems like yesterday we were teaching him how to boogie board and ride a dirt bike and he thought we were the coolest people in the world wanting to spend all of his time with us when he was visiting...and that time is long, long gone. It's gone in a blink of an eye really and it will never come back. You will never be small enough to fit in the crook of my arm again, or 5 again, or 8 again, or 12 on the verge of being a "rad teenager" again. And suddenly you realize that a person's childhood is so short. So, so, so short. I can already see my own sweet child o' mine changing from a cute little chubby faced toddler to a tall, long limbed big girl with her own funny personality and unique style and talents who's going to be starting kindergarden soon. And "the baby"... forget it. He's already rejecting all things baby and is now addicted to anything with wheels, and making sound effects to every action, running instead of walking and wanting to be a "big boy" and stay at preschool when I drop off sissy as opposed to coming home with mommy. *sniff sniff*

(I win that one though....for now.)

So I think as a parent, you just have to make the most of it, try to create moments and memories as much as you can, be in the moment more than you're not and try to spend your "at home" days giving your all so that you have no regrets when you have to be away.  ...As well as get stuff done around the house of course. Balance.

Reign It In With A Quote: Just the other day I found this quote (pictured below) and it spoke to me so deeply I painted it for my kitchen with my daughter's watercolors one sleepless middle of the night.

Momsomnia.  

Lately, I have been feeling like I need to put more time and energy into somehow making this mom's blog o' mine as well as the facebook page that goes along with it (drum roll please) "more popular." It's stressful actually. I don't know how "big blogs" like HowToBeADad do it. It's a lot of work, time and energy in a very fickle online world of millions of funny parenting blogs. Sometimes no one comments or "shares" or even hits "like" and then you'll read a post from a blog like, The Pioneer Woman who literally has had 35,000 COMMENTS on ONE post.

Me: (disbelief) No.
Me: (shock and horror) YES!
Me: (indignant) Come on. You're exagerating. It's the Irish coming out in you again.
Me: (indifferent) Go read it yourself.  
*clicks link provided*
Me: (shock and horror) Are you frickin' kidding me?  
Me: (IKR?!) No, no I am NOT kidding you!  
Me: (shock and horror)Wow!
Me: (nodding - subdued shock and horror) wow.

The Pioneer Woman. 639K facebook likes alone. Shit just got real, Son.

It's enough to make a no-name baby mama writer like myself go batty just getting people to read, let alone have any back-and-forth dialogue about it.  My average reader comment is 0. That is not a typo.

But--- then I found this quote...and *exhale* ...it just fit. It put things into perspective for me and made me feel a bit less "cray-cray" about generating more and more and more of a blog audience.

So now I'm back to just writing silly ol' lil tid-bits here and there for me mum.

So Charlie from HowToBeADad (who kind of resembles my brother-in-law a wee bit)~this one's for you too. For what it's worth.  

Will Work From Home. Painted quotes for sale.
...baby's gotta eat.

Oh and before I go, you can all take this visual with you and break it out whenever you need it. This is from my funny hubby. Do you remember that poster that used to be in your childhood dentist's office and it had a fuzzy baby cat hanging by two paws from a tree branch and the caption read:

"Hang in there!"

My husband does that to me whenever I'm feeling overly stressed about being a SAHM to two crazy kids who like to fight over toys they didn't care about til the other one started playing with it, and who don't want to eat their scrambled eggs and cheese and I'm standing at the kitchen sink up to my elbows in dirty dishes - so pretty much daily - and as he's heading out to work he'll make a funny "oh crap I'm falling. I can't hang on any longer" face and hang his hands on an imaginary tree limb and say, 

"Hey Babe, Hang in there!"  

Then the door closes and I can hear him "meow" as he heads to the garage.  

Moral of the story: It's good to know funny people, marry funny people, give birth to funny people or be a funny people yourself. 

Hang in there everyone. It's almost Friday!


Your pal,
@Coco_Cana

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Sibling Irony #3: Presents: Funny Kid Arguments. Toddler vs. Preschooler

My toddler is such an optimist. He's been walking around all day long saying, "it's almost Friday!"  Considering it was Monday, I didn't have the heart to correct him. Even though I don't think he even knows what "Monday" is.  So in typical toddler fashion - and if you know toddlers then you know what I'm talking about - he proceeded to spend the rest of the day telling everyone that it was, "almost Friday!"  And depending on how you look at it, he was right. It was almost Friday - in four days. Glass half full. I like that.

However, Big Sissy was growing tired of all of Baby Brother's "unnecessary" celebrating. Here's how it all went down. 

(SIDE NOTE: I'm trying to nip all of the excess fighting in the bud...but this particular argument was kinda funny so it was hard not to laugh while I was telling them to use their nice words with each other.) 

Baby Brother: “It's Almost Friday!”

Big Sissy: “No it isn't.”

Baby Brother: “Yes it is!”

Big Sissy: “No it ISN'T!”

Baby Brother: “Yes it IS, Sissy!”  ("Sissy" said with a tiny lisp, btw.)

(SIDE NOTE: Due to budgeting and time constraints I've edited the actual number of times this dialogue went back and forth. Once again if you know toddlers and preschoolers - especially those who are siblings - then you know what I'm talking about.) 

Baby Brother: “It's Almost Friday!”

Big Sissy: “Mooooooom, he keeps saying it's almost Friday!

Mom: (behind locked door) "Hey! Quiet down out there! I'm trying to watch last night's 15-hour re-cap episode of The Bachelor on TiVo and finish off these chocolate brownies before daddy eats them all and I can't hear myself think with all that yelling!" 

Juuuuust kiddiiiiiiing. 

You started to have some serious judgements going on though, didn'tcha? Come on admit it!  I saw your eyebrows raise up. We actually don't even have TiVo, so of course that's not true.

 Where were we?  Oh yea - back to the toddler vs. preschooler argument du jour...

"No it's not." 

"Yes it is."

Big Sissy: “He keeps saying it's almost Friday and it's not Friday!  It's January!"

Mama: (trying to muffle the laugh-cough into a bent elbow)"Well Birdie, Baby Brother doesn't really know what day it is. He's only 2 years old. He's just saying it's 'Friday' because he's heard us say that before and he's trying out new words so he can be a part of our conversation too. Today is actually Monday. So instead of yelling at him that he's wrong, let's try to teach our Baby Brother with our nice words that today is Monday but that Friday will be here soon.... OK, Love?"

Big Sissy: (to Baby Brother in the sassy voice reserved for 4 year olds who are trying to "school" their baby siblings) "It's not Friday, Bay. It's Monday.... AND it's January!"

Mom: (oh yea I forgot - mom brain) "Actually Birdie, it's February. Last month was January and this month is February. That's why we've been making our Valentine's Day cards for school because our Valentine's Day party is February 14th, remember? Next month it changes again and it will be March.... And we're using nice voices with each other, please. If not, then you will be choosing to have some time away from playing trains to cool off.

Baby Brother: (as if he's just invented bubblegum) “IT'S ALMOST FRIDAY!”

Big Sissy: (in her nicest, big girl 'teaching voice') "It's not Friday, Baby Brother (caressing his cheek to soften the blow of bad news) it's actually Monday - Feb-boo-r-air-y. January is over...(shakes head) It's gone, Bay Man. Gone forever. And Friday is in 8 days...OK Love?”

Baby Brother: (running the other way with his sword in the air) “Hey-evy-body! It's Almost Friday!”

Big Sissy: “MOOOOOOOOOOOM!”

Mom: (walks into the kitchen looking for pan of chocolate brownies - thinking of ordering TiVo.)

Are we there yet?  Why yes. Yes we are.

Happy almost Friday everyone!

Are you following @coco_cana on twitter yet? She doesn't really know how it works so it's kinda funny watching her flail around over there. Good for a laugh. 

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Mom's To Do List. Wait, you made one...right?

Please share this with someone who can relate to this pain.

Are YOU on the Christmas Card List? -----> 

Psst!  There's still time! 

HURRY!! -----> Click here!! <----->

Have you a twitter darling? 

Got'cherself a facebook do ya?

Oh come on!  What's a girl gotta do for some likes around here? Give away free coffee or somethin'?

My Child Gets So Distracted!

Can you relate?  This can be very frustrating sometimes. Like when we are running late for preschool and she needs to go grab her sweatshirt off of the hook in her room "real quick" and minutes later I walk in there to find her on the floor surrounded by her Calico Critters*, lost in a make-believe world of super tiny animals and their even smaller hairbrushes, outfits and toys - her sweatshirt still hanging on her hook.  

So when we are trying to get out the door in a hurry a sidetracked, easily distracted preschooler can make me want to pull my wet pony tail out.  (Wait...don't all mom's shove their wet hair into a pony tail before dropping their child off at preschool?  Hey, at least we're finally at the age of "mom gets a morning shower" now. The baby years...not so much.)

However, having a child who gets lost on the way from the kitchen to the bathroom and winds up in the playroom does have it's advantages. This is how it worked in my favor today:

Preschooler: "Mommy, can I play a game on the iPad?"

Mommy: "Sure. As soon as you clean up all of your coloring stuff and crafting stuff you can play your game."

Preschooler: "OK, Mommy....."

25 minutes later "Preschooler" is still quietly coloring away creating an entire fantasy world of dinosaurs, birds, sea turtles and butterflies, unicorns and fairy dust with a blank sheet of paper and some colored pencils. The iPad hasn't been mentioned once.

This is the plus side to a child getting sidetracked and distracted when you ask them to "complete a task."

Win for Mommy.
Win for Preschooler.

My 3 yr old Mad Scientist having a very Jackson Pollock moment.
Today's artwork wasn't captured on film - so I'm using this gem.

*I love Calico Critters btw. No batteries, no obnoxious noises, no songs that can't be turned off regardless what you do to them. They are just well-made toys perfect for make believe. They are for girls and boys and have a wide age range too. My daughter got turned on to them as a 2 yr old and still loves them, as did her 6 & 8 year old cousins when they came to visit. They are pricey though! I will say that. But the quality is hard to beat. You get what you pay for when it comes to toys. They are great to add to your child's wish list. The one you give out to family!  wink*wink

I'm just a Calico Girl living in a Critter world.

This happened today....sorta.

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Back To School: Preschool Earthquake Kit

“...there's no harm in hoping for the best as long as you're prepared for the worst.” 
― Stephen King, Different Seasons

If you were a child in the 70's or 80's - this probably looks familiar to you.

Here is a list of items that have been requested by my daughter's preschool for her earthquake kit. I've been a stay-at-home-mom her whole life and never gave it a second thought that there might be a major, catastrophic emergency where she was NOT with me. *Cue the pit in my stomach.*  So here I am making a preparedness packet of items for my daughter to use at school in the event of an emergency (before I can get there to pick her up.)

I'm realizing that it would be a good idea to have these things in one spot at home too (like a big plastic bin/tub with a lid that sealed) along with plenty of bottled water.  Living in "earthquake country" we should already have this, and we do in our pantry - sorta... however, it should really be in one spot that can be grabbed quickly. It would be a good idea to change everything out once a year or once every two years depending on the item to be sure it's fresh - including bottled water. Especially if it's kept in a garage where the temperature can change drastically depending on the time of year.

The food items listed below may or may not be things you normally serve to your children, especially if you typically do not buy prepackaged items. But in the case of an emergency - especially when your child is at school, you will want to have things nearby that do not require refrigeration or cooking, or items that are perishable are easily damaged like crackers/cookies in a baggie that can get smashed. Also, don't include items in the school packet that require water to hydrate the item like instant oatmeal or soup cups. Be sure to check with your child's school about bringing peanut butter or items containing peanuts. Many schools do not allow these items due to peanut allergies.


Here are some suggestions. Not all items will fit in the large ziploc bag, so choose about 4-6 items.

• 1-2 boxed juices or bottles of water
• 1-2 small pop-top cans of spaghetti, stew, tuna, Vienna sausage
• 1-2 fruit rolls or fruit snacks
• 1-2 individual fruit cups or pudding cups
• 1-2 small, individual boxes of cereal
• 1-2 individual applesauce cups
• Small pkg. of trail mix
• Small pkg. of beef jerky
• Small pkg. of cheese and cracker packs
• *Plastic fork/spoon if needed
• Small pkg. of wet wipes
• Box of band-aids
• Small pkg. of kleenex
• Small book, toy, game or other small activity

(For your school pack) PLEASE DO NO INCLUDE:

1. Fresh fruit or other perishables.
2. Glass containers.
3. Crackers/chips/cookies that can get broken and smashed.
4. Dehydrated food that requires water, (or any food that requires heat.)
5. Valuable items like cash, expensive gadgets/electronics, etc.

*If your child needs medication you'll need a form that your child's doctor will need to complete.  Bring the form and the medication (in the prescription bottle) along with proper instructions to the office for dispensing in case of emergency.



Here are some other items I thought would be good to add to the list:

• Individual squeeze packets. I like to use the Organic food packets like chicken and rice, veggies and fruit, or ready-to-eat "toddler meals," etc. We like, Happy Tot, Ella's Kitchen, Plum Organics, etc., which can be found in the baby food isle of any major store.
• Granola bars, "meal replacement" bars, protein bars, cereal bars, etc. (be sure to check for peanuts if this is an issue.)
• Dried or freeze dried fruit (raisins, banana/apple chips, dried apples/blueberries/peaches/prunes/apricots, etc.  Check for expiration dates.)
• Individual pkg. seaweed snacks, kale chips, etc. (these usually come wrapped in a small plastic container to keep them from getting broken.)
• Individual pkgs. of dried veggie sticks (like Snap Pea Crisps, etc.)
• A small lovie to comfort your child until you are there to get them. (Who doesn't love a good lovie?!) Or a small toy to keep them comforted until a loved one comes to get them. This might not seem like a necessity, but small children will typically be less scared if they have something from home that helps keep them calm and happy in a stressful situation where mommy and daddy are not there to hug them. I put a very small, very soft stuffed kitten along with a very small Lil Pet Shop puppy. Both took up little space (they both fit into a snack sized baggie labeled with her name on it) and I was confident they would provide much love and comfort to my daughter if there had been an emergency. 
• Anti-bacterial wipes or gel. In the event of no running water, you'll want your child to be able to clean their hands. 
• Identification card with current picture of your child, their current height/weight, possible allergies or required medications and phone numbers where parents/caregiver can be reached. Be sure to have these people on "the list" at your child's school as well so they are approved to come and get them. This info should be in the office already, but it's best to have it handy in your child's pack. This can be laminated and attached to a lanyard for your child to wear during an emergency. Small children who might be extremely scared due to a catastrophic emergency might not even remember their own name so this would be a big help to adults who are there helping. Make an extra one for the bag/backpack they take with them everyday. Since you have your laminator** out and are looking on your computer for pictures, print up a wallet sized picture of your family include the beloved pets and favorite lovies and add that to the back side of their identification card. Seeing your smiling, familiar faces will provide them with extra comfort. 
• Something warm. Regardless of the time of year, it's good to have a sweater/sweatshirt for your child in case it's late in the day before you can get them, or God forbid they need to be there overnight (in extreme emergencies.) Most preschools and daycares already require you to bring a change of clothing for your child in case they have an accident, so you can have it in that bag. Be sure to include a sturdy pair of close-toed shoes and socks in this clothing pack too and don't forget to label everything with your child's full name. *When your child moves up a size in shoes, clothes (or diapers if needed) don't forget to change out your school clothing pack too. Make sure all personal items are labeled with your child's name and room #.
• Item List. Just to keep everything organized I would include a sheet of paper in the packet with your child's info (include room # and teacher) on it as well as an itemized list of the things in their pack so that things can easily be accounted for after it's been opened. It might be helpful to label each disposable item with a sharpie (w/your child's name/room #) and tag the personal items as well. If a situation arrises that your child will be needing these things at school this will help to eliminate any confusion during an already stressful time and to ensure your child has the food and comfort items they are already familiar with.  

*The school list didn't include medicated ointment or any wound cleaner, cotton balls for cleaning, etc. for the Earthquake Kit. I might include these items as well but it's good to make sure they have an updated first aid kit in the classroom as well or see if it's OK to provide a small one in your child's bag. 

**Don't have a laminator available?  Take an index card and glue everything into place. Then take shiny, clear packing tape and gently cover both sides of the card making sure all surfaces are covered. Punch a hole and attach it to your lanyard and voilà - laminated card. 


Did I leave anything out?  Any food or personal items that should be added to the list? What do you have prepped in case of an emergency?  Please comment below and I may include them in an updated post.

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Dear Neighbors, We Know Christmas Is Over But...

Dear Neighbors, 

     The removal of our blowup Santa Claus riding a motorcycle with a snowman in his side car on our lawn will be total and complete melt-down devastation to our 2 year old. So your help and understanding in this delicate matter will be greatly appreciated. Don't think of "Moto Santa" as a "Christmas decoration"...think of him as a garden gnome.

Sincerely, 

The neighbors who still have up their Christmas decorations. 

January 3, 2013

Moto Santa

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